TREEWEEK TWO ended this morning. Around fifty people, who had spent the last seven days living, eating, working and partying together at Seegut Blaue Blume in Buchenhain near Prenzlau, said their goodbyes as a big bus shuttled them back to Berlin, creating the final class trip vibes! From there, some people stayed, whereas others took connecting trains or planes to get back to their homes. I myself am in a train back home as I’m writing these lines. I was at TREEWEEK the previous year and enjoyed it enough to motivate myself to buy another ticket and be back in the same location this year. And, again, I enjoyed it enough so that there’s a non-zero chance I will be back if there’s TREEWEEK THREE next year.
A recurring event in a recurring venue with partly recurring attendees, but also new faces, is a great mix of familiarity and novelty. For comparison, I went to Jesscamp 2 and Jesscamp 3 and both events had a greater variety in experiences compared to the two TREEWEEKs, because the different size and type of venue led to different outcomes in terms of overall structure. TREEWEEK TWO, at least for me, was mostly more of the same. I hosted werewolf games last year, and did so this year. I played piano on my own and jammed with other musicians last year, and did so this year. I attended a bunch of interesting but not too discomforting workshops last year, and did so this year.
Somehow I feel like I did more of everything last year. Until a minute ago I thought this might be related to the fact that the first TREEWEEK was a day longer, but my calendar just informed me that this isn’t true; it was the same duration overall, just shifted by a weekday. Maybe my brain is fooling me and expanding the experiences in memory. Or maybe it’s the time I spent on activities this year that I didn’t spend last year. For example, I had to sit longer with my work. Also, there were two organized walks to nearby places; a lovely lake in the forest, and a museum of old cars and former East Germany (GDR) memorabilia, which I took part in and enjoyed very much.
Another thing I did this year was going to Movement workshops facilitated by Kristijan and inspired by Fighting Monkey. He did them every day and I joined them three days in a row, making them feel like a new routine part of my day. I started a regular practice of strength training earlier this year and also intensified dancing, and since then I feel I’m much more interested in “physical” activities like this compared to earlier camps (and also more capable - even though I still suck and throwing and catching), which I’m interpreting as a sign of personal growth.
I had great group conversations at TREEWEEK, but felt like they could have had more depth. I didn’t have intense one-on-one conversations, which I somewhat regret. There’s all this talk about vulnerability and opening up to each other and I feel like I’m not doing it enough. And it’s not that I don’t want to or am afraid of being vulnerable; it’s mostly because I still have difficulties initiating this type of connection because I don’t want to impose myself on others or make myself the topic of conversation. Again, everyone should have agency, but I feel I wish others used their agency to push me to reveal more of myself. I want others to want to see me and express that desire so that I don’t have to express my desire to be seen, which feels kind of narcissist. Although, well, I’ve said it now, if not to people’s faces, at least in a blog post.
I told people not to come to camps and retreats with too many expectations of transformation so they aren’t disappointed, and I didn’t come with explicit intentions, but there’s still a lowkey feeling of wishing to get something extraordinary, even if you don’t know what that’s supposed to mean; especially when you feel others are getting it and you don’t.
On the second day of TREEWEEK, we had a big Circling event, hosted by Michael. I felt that the circle definitely helped people open up and connect with each other. We first circled in pairs, then groups of four, and then finally a larger group. A fascinating observation shared by one of the participants was that he feels that a man circling with another man versus a woman feels different, because with another man there are often status games and men trying to assert dominance. I’m not sure if this is a general phenomenon, but for me this was interesting because it was a confirmation for my self-assessment of not being typically masculine. I can definitely say for myself that, as long as I feel I’m accepted by the others - which I did feel - I’m generally uninterested in constructing any sort of status hierarchy among the men, whether in a circle or in the whole retreat, and finding my place in such a hierarchy.
As we’re already on the topic of gender: around 20-25% of TREEWEEK participants were women (if I counted correctly). The skewed gender ratio is, of course, no complaint to the organizers and simply a reflection of the communities whose members came to this retreat. It’s my impression that this wasn’t an issue for neither men nor women and didn’t create any problematic social dynamics, at least none that I observed (if I’m being too naive here - DMs are open …). I also think the event felt inclusive. Still, I must say I wish the gender ratio was more balanced. I apologize in advance if the next statement sounds objectifying, but talking to a woman in a situation where their gender is in the minority feels like straining a scarce resource, and that feels uncomfortable. I very much prefer existing in my abundance mindset (like I could on my summer workation to Greece that was 70% women).
Overall, TREEWEEK was surely a week well spent. It was an opportunity to connect and reconnect, an opportunity to be in a different environment for a few days, to experience what co-living means, and opening your mind to new things and ideas. I saw awesome people with amazing ideas and hobbies and projects. The good part of this is the inspiration, the slightly sadder part is seeing all the things you could be but aren’t, since, as they say, “you can be anything but not everything”.
As my train slowly approaches the more familiar territory that I call home, I will bring this post to an end, send you “many blessings” and hope we’ll meet again at another camp!
“Hosting” was a big theme for me in 2024. In January, I hosted my first two-hour party at my home following Nick Grays’s formula. In March, I traveled to Berlin and co-hosted an Interintellect salon with Simon at his place, talking “meta” about hosting and sharing my experiences from the party. I ended up hosting additional instances of the two-hour party in April and November. I continued hosting a public board game night at a local community space twice every month and, together with two friends, co-hosted two additional full-day special editions of board game meetups. With my local Effective Altruist group, we hosted another intro talk. For professional networking and bringing together the local developer and tech scene, I co-hosted three Webmontag (“Web Monday”) Mittelhessen meetups throughout the year, rebuilding the event series that had stopped with the COVID pandemic.
I also participated in many events I didn’t host, like tech and game meetups in the greater area. I had some invitations to birthday parties from people where I attribute my inclusion at least partly to my activities as a two-hour party host. I attended a running dinner event in my city for the first time.
Also, I traveled to meet people and join a like-minded community for a limited time. My first travel destination was the German Effective Altruist Community Builder weekend. Furthermore, I attended two “TPOT camps”, Jesscamp 3 (I didn’t write a blog post, but you can read the one from Jesscamp 2 in 2023) and TREEWEEK. Luckily, the dates aligned, so I combined Jesscamp 3 with a NoCode conference and a Ness Labs meetup in London. In the summer, I went to Greece for a two-week workation hosted by Ida from Playground (who I initially knew via Ness Labs).
As for online activities, I attended the two-week Microsolidarity Vibes program after meeting some from the community at TREEWEEK. I will not list all the one-on-one catchups, offline and online, as there would be too many.
I’m motivated to continue hosting for the new year. There should be more Webmontag meetups, and I want to get more local companies on board and deepen my ties with the universities. I also want to host more two-hour parties, experiment with modifying the format, and support others in hosting similar events (two friends have already indicated interest). I will keep on hosting the regular board game nights. However, I’m also building a hosting team to sometimes step away and keep the events in capable hands while I go on new adventures. There’ll probably be no larger board game events under my lead, as one of their co-organizers has opened a shop and runs these professionally.
I’ve tremendously enjoyed all the social activities I led and participated in the past year. At the same time, I’m questioning my priorities, wondering what my goals with hosting and community building are and if I should be more strategic about them. One goal might be to have a more substantial professional focus, tying in with an overall strategy for my freelance business. I wanted to move to new projects in the past year but hardly did. Instead, I kept nurturing existing projects and client relationships. If that continues, I don’t need a lot of professional networking opportunities, but I don’t want it to continue that way. So, I need to focus on business strategy and have at least part of my socializing aligned with that strategy. Conversely, I’m still open to romantic relationships, so my socializing should also help me build and leverage a dating pool. Finally, I want to emphasize the intercultural component in my community building.
I also think about location. On the one hand, I want to travel and see places and meet people from different countries and continents. I don’t live in a “TPOT hub” like Berlin, so my online communities have no offline equivalent in my location, and I need to travel to meet them IRL. On the other hand, I am happy in my hometown, Gießen (Giessen), with family nearby, old friends, and the local community that I’ve built in the past decade I’ve been back here. I can’t imagine moving away permanently, except maybe for a spouse who’s more tied to her location than I am. I haven’t fully tapped into the potential of this city, although I’m also well aware that the potential of a town with less than 100K inhabitants, most of which are college students, is limited. I don’t think I can simultaneously be an avid traveler and involved in a global community while actively building a local community. Or maybe I can, but then I must be more deliberate and strategic. I won’t be happy if I feel torn between places.
There’s also a variant that I haven’t explored as much as I could, and that is expanding on including nearby cities like Frankfurt in my socializing and networking activities, stretching the area while staying rooted. Many options! I plan to set some goals in the next few days and write a follow-up post here.
Happy New Year! I wish you all a great 2025. This post is not yet a yearly review or planning post, although I plan to write one, but an announcement: to kick off the new year, I’ve decided to take at least a one-month break from X (Twitter), with the option to extend it further or even indefinitely. It’s been my tradition to reflect on my social media usage at the change of the year. I published my thoughts on this blog in December 2022 (for 2023) and January 2024, and here’s the 2025 version.
I want to explain why I’m taking a break from X but not other social media. I’ve always had mixed feelings about my relationship with social media. It’s a great way to stay in touch with people, learn about what’s happening in the world, and form new connections. At the same time, it can be a huge time sink that results in overstimulation and too much inspiration and exploration at times when I should focus on my current priorities.
Lately, going on X feels different. The algorithmic timeline promotes content from people, including, most prominently, those you don’t follow. It’s addictive and invites users to pull to refresh for new activities and stay hooked endlessly. Trending topics are ever present in the sidebar. That alone would be bad enough but manageable. However, the overall vibe of the general public discourse on X is outrage and negativity. I’m getting a full blast of German and US politics. Whatever is trending lacks nuance. It’s a constant stream of people lamenting the state of the world, with simplified explanations full of racism and misogyny and very few attempts at solutions except for super-populist ones. X has put the doom in doomscrolling.
The older I get, the less tolerance I seem to develop for straight negativity. Too often, I see people unhappy in their current life situations and focus their anger outward on whoever is a convenient scapegoat. I’m not naive; I don’t see the world with rose-colored glasses and pretend everything is great. However, I believe in the potential of individuals to self-improve and humanity to solve global problems, and the first step is an honest look at yourself and the state of the world and what works and what doesn’t. Then, you can engage in constructive criticism while remaining compassionate to what or who you criticize and eventually develop solutions. This is positivity and optimism, and that’s the energy I want in my life: to focus on what I want to see more of.
Of course, I could adapt my X experience. Nobody forces me to click on trending topics and hashtags, but sometimes, it’s hard to look away, even when you know you shouldn’t be looking. I don’t want to sit in a continuous marshmallow test. I could go for sophisticated solutions, such as browser plugins that hide everything except the Following feed, but I don’t feel motivated right now. Also, even if it’s hidden, I’d know it’d be there and feel intrigued to look. I’ve always felt drawn to alternative, decentralized, ethical, social media like Mastodon and BlueSky. While reducing the overall time spent, I want to focus my attention there instead of X for personal social media use. Many people already shifted part-time there. I’ve also connected with peers on private group chats on Telegram and Discord or forums, so an extended break from X will not cut me off from TPOT.
If you’re following me on X, see you on the other side or not. In the meantime, feel free to connect on Mastodon, BlueSky, micro.blog, LinkedIn or Facebook.